So much loss

So much loss. Every day. Every day: she still isn’t here. It occurs to me I should take a picture of her crocuses to show her…later. I’ll show her later. It gets later and later. She still isn’t here. I try to do as we mourners are told: “live in the moment.” In that “now,” […]

Clock Spat: Past

For two and a half months now, my partner Susan and I have been arguing about how often to pull the chains on her grandmother’s clock. Although she’s had this clock for decades and we have taken care of it together for almost all of that time, she recently decided that I was winding it […]

Here. Blink. Gone.

It was a long time coming, her leaving. It took almost 3 years for the stage IV ovarian cancer to do her in. Almost 3 years, that is, after she was diagnosed. Who knows how long IT was there, festering, until she got that terrible, loud, hacking cough that wouldn’t go away, and they found […]

Dear Susan

[My partner, Susan, died two weeks ago of ovarian cancer. This is what I read at the memorial service today, December 16, 2012.] My dear dear Susan, In the much-too-short video you left for me, you told that me one of the most important things to you in our long relationship was that I had […]

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